Scoliosis // Skoliosis

assalammualaikum .

I never really open up that much about my life and yes people always assumed i had happy life and i dont have any miserable problem . So i would like to share something quite personal for me because for teenager who is going through this , you are not alone .

This is story of how i was diagnose with scoliosis .

So , the usual thing bila nak daftar masuk asrama penuh , you have to fill a form which include medical checkup . I enter boarding school when i was 16 based on pmr result . I never look at my xray until my doctor check it up just to reconfirm my medical checkup . He was totally in shock because there was a curve at my vertebral column . From the end of cervical vertebrae to my thoracic vertebrae ( vertebrae divided into five and cervical and thoracic is the first and second part). He was like go see doktor pakar tulang immediately . Tapi oh well me , tangguh sampai a yearlater after i fall from toilet like so hard and causes really excruciating pain at my back . But still i dont see the proper doctor until terseliuh kaki masa spm sampai kena buat xray sebab kaki bengkak teruk and i have to wear bandage for the next one week throughout spm week ( yaaaay so clumsy of me ) but again i didnt had a proper diagnose since i had add maths paper the next day ( u dont know how stressful i am) .

I dont have a proper diagnose until december 2013 . I was terrified and pretty much had tachycardia (lol exaggerate) when i was waiting for my name to be called . As i enter the room , it was pretty much nerve wrecking eventhough the doctor was really calm and smiling at me . When he start to check and start explaining it to my parents , i was like " no surgery please , no surgery please "  yupp i was scared to death if i heard a word name surgery . (Cliche me , now studying medic ). So he calculate the angle of my curveness somehow i didnt understand and he said " based on your curve , you didnt need to undergo surgery (pheww) and because it didnt effect your lumbar part , you wont have problem if you're pregnant" (never thought of that lol) anyhow , he adviced me to really take care of my posture and come out with diagnose which is Adolescent Idiopathic Scoliosis . Idiopathic is just a fancy medical term for unknown cause . No one in my big family had it , it was just me . 

The saddest part of having scoliosis is when you suddenly had excruciating backpain (especially during lecture and study) and you cant really do anything because the only cure for scoliosis is surgery . So i just realised i have to bare this kind of pain for the rest of my life .My doctor did gave me pain killer but i never really take any of it because i dont want to depend on pain killer for the rest of my life and yes i dont want to damage my liver . As i grew older idky my backpain just appear more frequent and sometimes it's unbearable and the only thing i can do it just lay down flat in my bed and sleep so i wont feel the pain . 

So to anyone especially teenagers ( it's a common disease tho) , if you are going to the same thing as mine , you are not alone. I know it hurts but just remind yourself back why allah put you in this condition? Because he know you are strong to face it through . What i did if the pain come , is just dont think too much about the pain or else you cant really do any productive thing in your life . Trust me , i never really like long lecture because the pain will come and i cant really go out of the class because i dont want to miss the lecture . ( dilemma much) 

Thank you for reading . 

P/s- certain people had to go through surgery , but im not sure if the backpain subside after the surgery

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